Physical Therapy

My doctor thought PT would be good for my back, so about 12 weeks ago I started going to a clinic in town. I am not fond of exercising and ever since my foot surgery (almost two years ago) I have been a major slacker. Well, those days are over.

First visit there, Marlene did my initial evaluation. I thought, “This shouldn’t be too bad, She looks fairly harmless.” I know that I am really out of shape (not that I was ever in shape) and was hoping for a therapist who would be sympathetic when I said, “This is too hard!” Then they would say something like this, “Ok, only do ten instead of twenty.”

Second visit there, I am informed that Steve will be handling my therapy. Wait, Wait, Wait! What happened to Marlene? I take one look at Steve and see my “therapist being sympathetic” concept die. He asks if I am doing 100 bridges. I say, “I am suppose to do 25.” He says, “You need to do 100 even if you have to take some breaks.” Sheesh!

Bridges are really pelvic thrusts. There are a lot of ways to perform them, too. Sometimes I can’t help but smirk when he does a demonstration .

I find it embarrassing to have an audience while exercising and there is nowhere to hide from Steve. He’s extremely adept at noticing my slacking or cheating. I think it has something to do with all of the mirrors they have in that place! Sometimes I am the only patient he has and then he stays with me watching every move I make. I want to say, “Don’t you have some paperwork or something like that to do?”

One day I was balancing on one foot while pulling a red stretchy thing and not being very steady on my left foot, I had to put my right foot down several times to catch myself. This is what he said, “That’s really good that you can keep yourself from falling.” “A lot of elderly people get injured because they are unsteady and can’t catch themselves when they start to fall.”
What the . . .? Did he just call me elderly?

Actually, I really like Steve, even if he does think I’m old enough to be his grandmother!

I am about done with my physical therapy and I have to admit, I will really miss it. If it wasn’t so expensive, I would go forever. Some days I walk in there with a really sore back and it always feels better when I leave. I would even pick a tough therapist. I wouldn’t have come as far with someone who didn’t push me to my limit. (Dang, I hate to admit that).

Dr. Visit

It seems that I switch doctors every two or three years and I guess it’s because I need a clean slate from which to work from. I wonder if that time is approaching again.

I went to the Dr. yesterday to YES, have another urine check. I started panicking about 40 minutes before the appointment so I found a container and decided to put my own personal sample from home in my purse "just in case." I felt like a drug addict trying to sneak urine into the drug testing office. Then I drank a WHOLE ton of water just like Charlotte did so that I would have no excuse not to produce a sizable sample.

I got to the Dr’s office and after sitting in the waiting room for about 10 minutes I knew I wasn’t going to last until they called my name. I explained my problem to the receptionist. She told me to use the bathroom behind her. One of the nurses handed me a cup and I closed the door. Just as I started to fill the cup, it slipped from my hand and FELL into the toilet! Dammit all to hell! Then, of course, I had to fish the dang thing out of the toilet and leave the bathroom without a sample and tell the nurse what had happened.

I chickened out on telling them I had a sample in my purse because I was afraid they would really think I was weird. (I know, I am weird.)

I was hoping to redeem myself after the last visit but to no avail.