I wondered how long it would take before I kind of forgot about the blogging thing. It seems like a lot of work, besides I have really been keeping an eye on the Facebook thing. It is so fast to post a little note and then check on all your friends and I don't have to think too hard. (I hate that thinking stuff).
I have written down several stories from the store, but I fear they are not as funny as the first ones. I will post a couple of them now and a couple more in a few days.
I thought since I was making fun of the people I meet at work that I would even things out and reveal one of the many embarrassing things I do. I do this all the time. Customer walks in, I greet, I walk to other end of counter, turn around, see a person, greet person, get funny look, ask person if I already asked how they were 10 seconds before, they say “yes” I say, “I must really care about you.” GEEEZE!
Enough about me, now the customer stuff.
The other night a man was looking at our Indian rugs. I went back to see if he needed any help. Here’s how it went.
Me – “Is there anything I can help you with?”
Customer - “Well, I have a table that needs something like this, (pointing to small rug) what would you call this?”
Me – “I would call it a table runner.”
Customer – “Oh yeah, a table runner.” “The table I need it for is teakwood and it is this long and this wide.” “I really want to introduce some red.” “My walls are green, not this green, a little lighter, maybe more like this green just softer.” They look like rock because I had a guy come paint my walls with this plaster stuff.” “The table is a teakwood,
ME -- “Yes, I know what teakwood is.”
(Continuing) - the trim around the room is wood, kind of what you have here but maybe a little darker.” “Well, not too much darker, maybe it is about the same.” “My floors are wood, too.” “Let’s pretend this is my room, I have a mahogany leather couch here, another leather chair on this side and one more chair over here.”
At this point my eyes are glazed over and I am wondering how the hell I am going to get away from this one. We talked some more, I heard more details, got out several runners for him to look at, told him I would check back after I helped some other customers. Luckily for me, there WERE other customers that needed help so I never did “check back”, and he never did buy a rug.
NOTE TO MYSELF: Remember not to go on and on and on to people you don’t even know, especially when all you want is a table runner.
This woman was shopping in our store with her two kids. They looked at some stuff and wanted to know what was real. What do people mean when they say that? Does it look like all of the merchandise in our store is a figment of their imagination? The kids were nice but the mother was, well, strange. One of the things they bought was a fish fossil. “Is this real?” “Yes.” “How do you know?” “Because it came from a fossil quarry in Wyoming.” “How do they know it is real?” “Because they dug it out of the sandstone themselves and btw, it is 50 million years old.” “How do you know how old it is?” “Because we hire a paleontologist to carbon date all of our merchandise.” “I’m sorry, but I have to go help someone else now and if you want to know why it is because you are driving me crazy.”
We are not a discount store but we still get asked this all the time - “How much is this?” “$9.99." “How much is it if I buy two?” “Still $9.99." “How much is it if I buy three?” “Let’s see, we will sell you three for $29.97."
That is better than the ones that don’t want to pay at all. One problem is the replica pipes we sell. Several teenagers came in during the Sundance chaos and hung around the area with the pipes. It is right in front of the cash register, so I didn’t move, told them I would help them with anything they needed so they would know they were being watched. FINALLY, they left the pipes and went upstairs. The girl had a little coin purse from the toy area in her hand before she went up there and when she came down she didn’t have it. As she was leaving, Katie asked her if she wanted to pay for the coin purse and she (very flustered) said “Oh, I forgot about that” and then pulled it out of her pocket. So Katie nailed her for $3.50 and they didn’t get a pipe either! Yahoo for Katie’s crime fighting!
Enough about me, now the customer stuff.
The other night a man was looking at our Indian rugs. I went back to see if he needed any help. Here’s how it went.
Me – “Is there anything I can help you with?”
Customer - “Well, I have a table that needs something like this, (pointing to small rug) what would you call this?”
Me – “I would call it a table runner.”
Customer – “Oh yeah, a table runner.” “The table I need it for is teakwood and it is this long and this wide.” “I really want to introduce some red.” “My walls are green, not this green, a little lighter, maybe more like this green just softer.” They look like rock because I had a guy come paint my walls with this plaster stuff.” “The table is a teakwood,
ME -- “Yes, I know what teakwood is.”
(Continuing) - the trim around the room is wood, kind of what you have here but maybe a little darker.” “Well, not too much darker, maybe it is about the same.” “My floors are wood, too.” “Let’s pretend this is my room, I have a mahogany leather couch here, another leather chair on this side and one more chair over here.”
At this point my eyes are glazed over and I am wondering how the hell I am going to get away from this one. We talked some more, I heard more details, got out several runners for him to look at, told him I would check back after I helped some other customers. Luckily for me, there WERE other customers that needed help so I never did “check back”, and he never did buy a rug.
NOTE TO MYSELF: Remember not to go on and on and on to people you don’t even know, especially when all you want is a table runner.
This woman was shopping in our store with her two kids. They looked at some stuff and wanted to know what was real. What do people mean when they say that? Does it look like all of the merchandise in our store is a figment of their imagination? The kids were nice but the mother was, well, strange. One of the things they bought was a fish fossil. “Is this real?” “Yes.” “How do you know?” “Because it came from a fossil quarry in Wyoming.” “How do they know it is real?” “Because they dug it out of the sandstone themselves and btw, it is 50 million years old.” “How do you know how old it is?” “Because we hire a paleontologist to carbon date all of our merchandise.” “I’m sorry, but I have to go help someone else now and if you want to know why it is because you are driving me crazy.”
We are not a discount store but we still get asked this all the time - “How much is this?” “$9.99." “How much is it if I buy two?” “Still $9.99." “How much is it if I buy three?” “Let’s see, we will sell you three for $29.97."
That is better than the ones that don’t want to pay at all. One problem is the replica pipes we sell. Several teenagers came in during the Sundance chaos and hung around the area with the pipes. It is right in front of the cash register, so I didn’t move, told them I would help them with anything they needed so they would know they were being watched. FINALLY, they left the pipes and went upstairs. The girl had a little coin purse from the toy area in her hand before she went up there and when she came down she didn’t have it. As she was leaving, Katie asked her if she wanted to pay for the coin purse and she (very flustered) said “Oh, I forgot about that” and then pulled it out of her pocket. So Katie nailed her for $3.50 and they didn’t get a pipe either! Yahoo for Katie’s crime fighting!
